Like seemingly everyone else in the world, we LOVED the Divergent book series.  To clarify that sentiment, we LOVED Divergent, overlooked the convenient plot devices of Insurgent and reluctantly resigned ourselves to Allegient only because we like to see things through.

Naturally, or because we enjoy screaming at the big screen together, we have been extremely curious about the movie adaptations.  And they haven’t disappointed–by that, we mean we’ve drank a lot of wine from empty water bottles while in the theater and wondered what the hell was going on during both Divergent and Insurgent.  Seriously, the writing is mechanical and the plot doesn’t develop and the characters are all completely forgettable.  All of Insurgent was a dream sequence/video game, right?

Nonetheless, the drinking game continues and the trailer for the first half of Allegiant has just been released.  So, here is our review of the trailer.  Please watch/drink along with us as we discuss.

0:08 Wait a minute, why is everyone is still in a choosing ceremony?  Aren’t we at war over this? Oh, it’s old footage…

0:17 Was the first movie so complicated that you have to refresh our memories?

0:18 WHY?

0:19: Where’s the actual trailer?

0:24 There is STILL no preview footage

0:28 Let’s reinforce the guy saving the girl whose Dauntless, Divergent and a general badass.

0:32 The dreams/nightmares/video game sequences are back to haunt us.

0:34 STILL no new footage and I am beginning to wish for my two minutes back.

0:36 Mumbling…seriously, what did she say?

0:40 Four is telling everyone to fight back; Tris is the key.

0:47 Miles Teller is such a douche.

(This trailer is only 1:41 long)


0:51 Is it us or is Theo James aging at a much faster rater than anyone else.  He’s portraying 19 going on 34, no?

0:56 “It’s time.”  Oooooooh…..

1:02 ….to climb a fence (I mean, the wall)

1:09 How in Dystopia does Tris have a fresh blowout?

1:15 Angry stares. CONFLICT.


1:31 Am I really supposed to believe that this 100% CGI architecture exists not far from the Chicago that they have been showing me?

1:33 Jeff Daniels, what poor lifestyle choices brought you to this movie? They already tricked Kate Winslet and Naomi Watts into this mess!

1:35 “You saved a city. Help me save the world” ~eyes rolling into back of head

1:39:  We’ll be prepping our livers for March 2016. Naturally.